Thursday, November 29, 2007

How important is communication?

Thinking(yeah, I have these long stretches where it doesn't happen and then boom it all comes at once :)... Each of us live our individual lives, and the sad thing is we become content with it. Maybe sometimes we get this twisted view into our heads that the way things are is the way they were meant to be so let's just be content about it. But is it really that way?

I'm thinking mainly about our personal interactions throughout the day. Here's where I make good on the "promise" I made that I would put personal stuff up here. I find that from the moment I wake up to the moment my head hits the pillow at night: my interactions with people is quite limited. You know this could be related to the fact that I'm homeschooled, but I think maybe this is something all kinds of people may encounter.

We do our thing and think we're interfering in the lives of others if we interrupt them or something. I mean we may not say it out loud, "Um... I'm just going to pass you by and not say anything, because I'm afraid you won't respond, or that I'll be interfering in your life", but(personally, maybe I'm just a freak of nature) I sometimes think it. Are we too content with living our own lives? Do we truly care about other people?

If we truly care about someone, we should be able to show it, especially through verbal communication. Now, for some of us that interaction can be very limited throughout the week, which means that when we do see people we should be all the more ready and willing to participate in communication with other individuals. It just drives me crazy, and makes me mad at myself when I look someone in the eye and pass by them without saying a word, and know they feel the awkwardness just as bad.

There's circumstances of course, but I think maybe we come up with excuses when what we really should be doing is caring about another person enough to bring up meaningful conversation-which is more than just talking about the weather.

So, yeah, on one hand this post is mostly self-reflection; I just needed to write out my thoughts you know? It's something I need to work at: making opportunities to encourage my bros and siss in Christ, and be able to communicate more than a "How's it goin", "What's up?", "Cold day today eh?".

Tuesday, November 27, 2007

What I...

Should be doing: school or work on boss's website.
Am doing: writing this.
Will do next: watch House on tv.

Best part of this day: got a school extension I didn't think I'd get.
Who contacted me last: Laina sent me a notification on FB.
Who I talked to on the phone last: Ben.

What I wish would happen: Some people email me maybe.
What I'm doing tomorrow: swimming, going to work, and doing school.

What I'm listening to: Life 100.3
What book I'm reading lately: Case for a Creator, and before that the Ishbane Conspiracy.

Um... Yeah... so I know a couple ppl are coming on here, but I hope there's more. Thanks ya'll for commenting so far!

Friday, November 23, 2007

Suggested Coping Methods?

Yeah, so I know I make a really big deal out of getting my license, but I am really excited! Problem is: I don't think I'll pass it. Any coping methods if I don't get it???

Wednesday, November 21, 2007


So, I don't know if anyones reading this or not. So how's everybody's lives? Looking forward to the snow? I have mixed feelings... Although I am looking forward to trying out boarding...

Ok, so "serious" question? Do you truly really not like it when I photoshop a picture of you? Or innerly get a laugh out of it? I mean seriously.

Tuesday, November 20, 2007

Lacking Human Contact

Yeah, I'm bummed that there was no soccer. And it's not because it's soccer, but homeschool
group... er... not homeschool group, but seeing people is the highlight of my week.

I was at the library tonight... working... I just figured out my schedule when our Bible studies
were moved arbitrarily to my scheduled night. Vundaful... So now the last couple weeks I've
had to rush around struggling to switch with somebody...

I could really use an email... I'm not even sure who checks their email anymore, otherwise I
would send messages myself.

Well, hope everyone is having a good week; and if anyone from HSG happens to see this before
Thursday, I will see you then!

My Composition

Yeah, I found this program that let's you put in the chords you want and than add instruments. It's pretty cool. The first song I did was put in Dm Bb C F for "My Desire" and then remixed it.

Today I made my own song... Here it is... What do you think?

Download This File

Monday, November 19, 2007

My Desire

The song by Wilfred Bout... The timing is off, but that is because the program I used only has 4/4 timing.

Download This File

Friday, November 16, 2007

How do I hate thee? Let me show thy ways...

Ok, so for English we had to write a parody of a popular poem by Elizabeth Browning. Now, please note that we specifically had to make it "How do I hate thee?" otherwise I wouldn't have picked such a topic. Now, part way through I realized that the only person I could hate would be the devil. So, in an uncheesy way please read this as thinking about the devil.

The Original:
"How do I love thee? Let me count the ways.
"-Elizabeth Browning
I love thee to the depth and breadth and height
My soul can reach, when feeling out of sight
For the ends of Being and ideal Grace.
I love thee to the level of everyday's
Most quiet need, by sun and candle-light.
I love thee freely, as men strive for Right;
I love thee purely, as they turn from Praise.
I love thee with a passion put to use
In my old griefs, and with my childhood's faith.
I love thee with a love I seemed to lose
With my lost saints, --- I love thee with the breath,
Smiles, tears, of all my life! --- and, if God choose,
I shall but love thee better after death.

My Parody
"How do I hate thee? Let me show thy ways..."-Aaron Best

How do I hate thee? Let me show thy ways.
I hate thee in a way that is so right
Thy bad mouth can breach good standards with might
O to end thy being and in great haste
I hate thee to a level I can't say
Thy hurtful seed, is horrid to my sight.
I hate thee nearly, for your aren't in Light.
I hate sincerely, for you do not Praise.
I hate thee with a passion I won't lose
Thou art a thief, and in knowing I saith
I hate thee for my own vices you use
With your lost saints, --- I condemn thee to death.
Wiles, fears, and all thy strife ---for as God choose,
Thou shall burn as fetter e'er thy last breath

Sunday, November 11, 2007

Classical Arminianism

Yeah, a theological post. Now, I'm not sure how to approach this as I don't want to start a debate/argument, but would rather share something our catechism class was discussing and learning about. It's the differences between the Remonstrants and modern day Arminianism.

We all know the Canons of Dort, and how hard they can be on Arminians. They show inconsistencies in thinking, and point out very valid and Biblical reasons why we as Reformed people believe the way we do. I just think that maybe we don't really think about the context in which the Canons were written.

At the time of the writing of the Canons, there were some really crazy beliefs and thoughts floating around the theological communities. I don't think I need to quote any since they can mostly all be seen in the Rejection Paragraphs. These Canons were written, yes, as a declaration of faith, but probably more so as a counteract to the thinking of the day.

What we need to think about is the fact that we are living hundreds of years down the road from those times. The Remonstrants aren't so pronounced, and modern day Arminians are quite far off from what the Remonstrants believed. What an Arminian church may claim as their declaration of faith, may not be quite what the PEOPLE of that church believe in heart and soul.

There needs to be a realization of the difference. So just as we make a distinction between the "Catholic" church and the "Roman" church, we need to define our terms. After our discussion today, our Pastor chose the words "classical Arminians" in his sermon to describe the teachings of a truly stringent Arminian church. He did this to point out that the general "Arminian" church believe differently than what their creed might say they do.

We need to be aware and careful of a tendency to "be proudful of our humility". We know that according to the Reformed belief, the Reformed Christian "has more" to be thankful for and humble about. Sometimes this can translate(though unintentionally) to a personal pride in "being more humble than those proudful Arminians". We need to recognize they are our brothers and sisters in Christ, and probably share many beliefs at heart that we do.

Now, no debate. Sure, post your comment, but try not to be confrontational...

Friday, November 9, 2007

Some Thoughts

Iunno... I've had this on my mind for awhile. And it comes partly from that Voice of the Martyrs devotional I've had for two years. Once in a while I pick it up and read a story. They are amazing.

While it's a good book, I'm not writing about it. I just mention it, because
it has numerous stories in there of people who gave up the lives of their loved
ones for the Word. I've just been thinking. I would give my life for the Gospel and all those I care about in a second-no second thoughts. If I was told: "Recant, or he/she dies." What would my response be?

There's been a shift in the media. On the good'ol cowboy and star trek tv shows and movies-the heroes were always those who put themselves in danger or died for those they loved. Under pain of torture they persevered, and never gave up the secret code or combination for the lock.

Now, it's completely different. Take a look at Spiderman or Batman and you see that the villains don't just go after the superhero-they go after those they care about. And these stories I've been reading about in real life are just as scary. Instead of threatening someone with a cattle prod, the bad guys put a noose around your sister's neck. Most of these people never give in, but could I do the same?

Without trying to sound metaphysical, you think maybe the devil got the picture? Maybe it finally occurred to him that true Christians won't break under the pressure of pain. Pain just isn't relevant-we, as Christians, learn and gain from it. So he's changed his tactics and goes after those we love. Has he found our weak spot?

Can you say with absolute certainty that if some Muslim takes you and one of your siblings hostage, and tells you to recant or that sibling dies-would you have the strength to stand? Would it even be right to sacrifice the life of a loved one-God understands right?

In less dramatic ways I think it's happening all the time. Sometimes we're on good terms with ourselves-thinking we know what we believe and why we believe it. Then we see somebody we know and/or love struggling with something terrible, and it causes us to think again. It's the indirect assaults that are the hardest to deal with.

In war, it's not the full on frontal assaults that are the most deadly-they can be foreseen and prepared for. It's the sneaky blindsiding to our allies and friends which cause the most damage.

Monday, November 5, 2007

"I'm Not Alright"-Sanctus Real

Song I totally love... I know I've been posting songs and stuff lately, but you know-music helps get me through the day.

"If weakness is a wound that no one wants to speak of,
Then cool is just how far we have to fall
I am not immune-I only wanna be loved
But I feel safe behind the firewall
Can I lose my need to impress?
If you want the truth, I need to confess

I'm not alright
I'm broken inside, broken inside
And all I go through
It leads me to you, it leads me to you

Burn away the pride, bring me to my weakness
Until everything I hide behind is gone
and when I'm open wide with nothing left to cling to
only you are there to lead me on
Because honestly, I'm not that strong

I'm not alright - I'm broken inside, broken inside
and all i go through - it leads me to you, it leads me to you

(and now i'm moved, and now i'm moved, and now i'm moved)closer to you
(and now i'm moved, and now i'm moved, and now i'm moved)closer to you
(and now i'm moved, and now i'm moved, and now i'm moved)closer to you
(and now i'm moved, and now i'm moved, and now i'm moved)

I'm not alright - I'm broken inside, broken inside
I'm broken inside, broken inside
and all I go through leads me to you, leads me to you

I'm not alright - I'm not alright - I'm not alright
Thats why I need you"

So I noticed somebody said they need an incentive to blog again... Well to tell the truth, it's totally personal. I mean blogging used to be amazing. Like today me and Ben were going through that post that Mel wrote way back in 2006! The one about music, and it's soo cool to see everyone's opinions, and look back at my own.

Blogs offer a way for us to look back at what we used to think, feel, and(unfortunately in some cases) look like. I personally don't keep a journal-I know I should-but I don't. Just the last couple days getting back into reading the blogs, and going over what I and others wrote in the past few years... it's just really cool to see the problems we had, and look now and see that God is soo good.

Nothing really specific that I'm talking about, but like for myself I looked back at my posts from my dad's heart attack and how out of control I felt. Now I can look back, and have more peace right now through looking at God's provision.

That's not my only reason for blogging, but I have to say that it's a pretty awesome one...

Horrible Driving Lesson

Yeah, so Ben was over today suddenly which made me forget that I had a driving lesson. So 15 minutes after my lesson starts, my instructor phones and says she's in my driveway... bad way to start a lesson.

So, unfortunately I'm a defensive driver. I know aggressive is the way to go, but I'd rather be safe than sorry. I just drive defensively... I wait to see what's going on before I move. Well, since my teacher cannot read my thoughts and was getting ticked at my commentary-she didn't know that.

Suffice to say her voice rose in volume telling me to go faster, be decisive, etc... I didn't drive well, but that's cuz I was so internally mad I was ready to blow. Anyway, that lesson ended. I know I'm only a driving student, and she's an instructor-but, seriously, I do know how to drive: it's her comments that are freakin me out and making me nervous.

So... my day... hope everybody else has had a better one...

It wasn't all bad... me and Ben... cough... cough... accomplished something mischievous today-so we're happy :)

Saturday, November 3, 2007

Blogging League

So I created a very VERY simple script so that we can all synchronize our active blogs.

What you do:
Go to Blogger>Template>Page Elements>Add a Page Element

Pick HTML/Javascript and set a title. Maybe something like "Blogging League".
Next, put the following code into the "Content" box.

And that's it! You're done! Just add the page element and you should see all those who are currently blogging!

What I'm Watching

"Forgive Me"-Group1Crew

Father, I’m going through some heavy things
It seems like this world ain’t getting any better
The more we try to get closer to You
The farther we run from Your throne

I’ve spent so many nights wonderin’ when will it end
When will the day come when happiness begins
I’m running the race but it seems too hard to win
I’m sick of mourning my stomach is throwing up in the morning

I’m calling for help and watching it melt away
My heart’s been put on display and put away
In many ways, many times I told myself it was ok
And anger was the price that was paid
While these faded dreams just screamed to bring them home

The burden was too heavy I kept running from the throne
I can’t take it any longer
I can taste my spirit hunger
God please help me get home

Lord though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I’m not scared cause You’re holding my breath
I only fear that I don’t have enough time left
To tell the world that there’s no time left, Lord please
Lord though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death
I’m not scared cause You’re holding my breath
I only fear that I don’t have enough time left
To tell the world that there’s no time left

I’ve come to terms that I’m burning both sides of the rope
And I’m hoping that self-control would kick in before I’m choking off
The sin that be destroying every fiber I got
I need the Lord in every way I’ll never make it I’m not
Going back to the way I was before Christ in my life
I couldn’t do it I would lose it there’s no point to the fight
And I’m writing this song, for the people who don’t belong
I pray away the pain you feel from all the things that went wrong
Inside a life that’s filled with anger and disappointment
Cause daddy treated you weaker than all of the other kids
It’s annoying and I feel for all of you who wanna give up
You feel stuck I feel the same way Lord help us stay up
You couldn’t pay me to abandon the idea of true hope
That I could make it through this life into a place where there’s no crying
I’m dying to find You with open arms when I go
Knowing You love me and You waiting to give rest to my soul

Lord I don't know what I'm struggling for
There’s go to be more
Than this life I know
But still I’m here fighting to never give up
I find strength in Your love
And You will see me through

What I'm Listening To

"Romantic Love is Ergos Part 1"-James Macdonald

Download this File

Thursday, November 1, 2007

Tis late, but...

Well, after an awesome soccer game today I came home to do school... bleh... Biology can be cool, but not when you have 2 hours left to complete it and what begins to look like gibberish when you're falling over from sleepiness. So basicly I did what I could and gave up on the rest :) Pretty bad, but as long as I pass I'm happy.

So, I said I'd do something on Reformation Day. Well, I don't have much to say except for the fact that lots of people ask us what we do. It can be hard to explain sometimes, but I was kind of surprised by how many people actually knew who Luther and Calvin were. I had a harder time trying to think of the origins of Halloween. I heard something about being All-Saints day, but I always thought the occult made their holidays near the time of that as a mockery, but then I heard somewhere else that the Christians made the holiday near the occultic ones to deter from their celebrations. I'm not really sure what the case really was though...

So, for anyone who doesn't know-my dad and I visited Nobleton and had a marvelous potluck supper(one of my favorites being that wonderful meatloaf/ham/spinach roll that Miriam made :). After that we played quite the challenging game of Jeapardy which was pretty cool. I heard later that my church did the same thing that night, but that the questions were a little easier or something to that affect. Anyway, thanks for the invitation and had a great time!

So if anyone has some opinions on trick or treating, I'd love to hear them. Like: why exactly do we not trick or treat(aside from our age now)? Is it because of the whole demon/witch/ghost costumes and stuff? Is it just because it's secular? Is it because Reformation Day celebrations sounds like so much more fun? ;) Like is there a Biblical reason I shouldn't go trick or treating with some neighbors and be a witness by dressing up as Jean Cauvin(John Calvin) or Luther and ask for candy in German? lol